So you’re thinking that you need to change your job. You think a different place will make you happier and if only you didn’t have that jerk of a boss, you’d be able to go up the ladder quicker and be more successful.
But what if what you’re looking for can’t be found in a different job or office space? What if you’re looking for something deeper?
Because if that’s the case, it doesn’t matter where you’re working, you’re always going to feel unfulfilled.
Work, work, work…
Our lives today are so fuelled by how well we’re doing at work.
Finding your ‘purpose’ means having a job that you love doing, jump out of bed every day to go and do AND make a million each year, right?
Yet reality means that you’re probably doing a job to get an income in order to pay your bills and look after your family.
Pursuing your ‘dream job’ – if you even know what that is – and starting from scratch whilst earning a lot less is unappealing.
Therefore you head down the rabbit hole of trying to find purpose and meaning in your life without looking at the root cause of the lack of fulfilment in the first place.
Here are five deeper issues that I have found whilst working with my clients that can cause you to feel frustrated at work.
1: Lack of Appreciation:
Is it actually the job that is making you feel bad or is it because you’re feeling unappreciated – and maybe not just by the people at work?
Underappreciation makes us feel lacklustre. Why bother with any of it if no-one is going to even appreciate or acknowledge it. We all need to feel that what we’re doing is worthwhile.
If you’re feeling underappreciated then the first place you’re going to question is the safest – the one that is less personal and emotional – and that’s your workplace. Maybe a different company would help or a different boss? Maybe they’d appreciate you more…
But what if it’s not the company that’s not appreciating you; what if they are doing the same thing they have always done and it’s your attitude that has changed due to other circumstances.
Is it possible that you’re not getting the love and appreciation at home that would make the world of difference to you.
Think about it.
What support do you need to feel fulfilled doing what you’re doing right now? Where would that support come from? Do you need to talk to someone and open up about how you’re feeling and discuss options moving forward?
2: Lack of Creativity
Often, working life is dull. It’s all numbers and spreadsheets and board meetings. There’s nothing creative in there that gets your brain juices flowing.
If you are the kind of person who need creativity in their life and you’re not getting it from your work, then this itch will always cause you trouble.
But does your creativity have to come from your workplace? Is there something that you could do once you finish work that would fulfil that creative aspect in your mind?
Can you start a new hobby (that, who knows, could turn into a career that you love one day?)
What’s stopping you from going out there and doing something new?
3: Lack of Exercise
Exercise is essential to your overall sense of well-being.
We all know that it releases the feel good hormones that help you deal with stress and overwhelm.
If you’re feeling unhealthy then this is going to project itself in other areas of your life. Those that you might find easier to control – like feeling frustrated at work.
Rate your fitness between 1-10 currently and then ask yourself, what would it take to get one number up from there? Just one.
You don’t have to do something massive like the next London marathon but it could be going for a walk for 20-30 minutes a day. Walking to work instead of getting the bus, taking the stairs instead of the lift. NOT having that latte before work or changing a breakfast to something more protein-filled and less sugar-filled.
Fitness takes time to regain. If you’re thinking too big and that you’re never going to quickly achieve then you probably won’t; just create a change that is something small and achievable that you can do each day and stick to that. It will add up over time and then you’ll be able to add something new.
4: Lack of Relaxation
Do you give yourself permission to switch off? And I mean really switch off. No phone. No messages. Just down time for you to do something for you or nothing.
Your brain works so hard all the time, it needs time to switch off and take a step back to assess the situation that you’re in. A brain that is overstuffed with ideas, to do lists, activities has no space to create solutions to problems. You must allow yourself time to quieten it down.
Just 5 minutes a day of meditation – it doesn’t have to be on a special bean shaped cushion, just sitting with your eyes closed on your chair and allowing the thoughts to flow through without holding on to any of them could help. Surely you can allow yourself that?
5: Lack of Communication
This is probably the biggest thing that I work with with my clients. You may fear talking to others and upsetting them yet you are choosing to upset yourself by not sharing what’s going on in your head.
Talking is one of the best ways to make yourself feel heard and acknowledged. Just getting all the thoughts out of your head and into the open can be so releasing. If you don’t have someone at home who can listen without judgement, then you should consider getting yourself a therapist or a coach to create that safe space and explore what’s going on for you.
What to do?
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t change jobs if you’re really unhappy with where you are right now. But I want to make sure that you’re doing it for the right reasons and not one of the reasons above that can be solved outside of the workplace.
Have a think and come back to me with your thoughts.
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